Hey guys! Happy Monday. Ah, feels good doesn’t it? The odor of burnt flesh in the air, the despair plastered over every inch of humanity! Hoping to brighten our collective mood, Clayton let Bloggy grab a photo of the new Metron 55 clincher wheels (WHEL727000-WHEL727025) on his Cannondale. That frame looks pretty weird but the wheels look great, and according to Clayton, ride even better! Huzzah! Mazel Tov! Also, you’re missing your front wheel valve cap Clayton.
The sky is overcast and there is a chill to the air. A southerly wind shakes barren tree tops looming above our warehouse’s gabled roof as somewhere, deep within its dank and poorly lit recesses, a child-minded huckster from Tallahasee sprays Orange Seal all over a video studio. These are the lean times for Bloggy. Nobody is riding, the weather is garbage and the child-minded are swarming our hillsides like so many infestations of centuries past. Where have all the relevant blog posts gone? The internet is a barren wasteland; an endless void of Stygian irrelevance. We are not immune. Bloggy has nothing for you. Nothing, except for an Abus USB stick that is a functioning lock and the perplexing copy of a child-minded video wizard lost within his own Orange Seal reverie.
Hey shop owners, don’t forget to stock plenty of antiseptic ointment for all of your riders’ boo-boo’s. Might Bloggy recommend a tube of A3 Road Rash (BODY2002 in our catalog)? It’s fast acting and leaves your skin scar-free. Works on all cycling related injuries.
Well, not all cycling-related injuries (rubs hands together nervously). Just in case you forgot, don’t forget to not look at Ryan Trebon’s leg wound from Sunday’s cyclocross world championships in Hoogerheide. Looks like something from a Cronenberg movie.
Clayton brought his rescue dog Rosie to work today. She’s quite the sweetheart; friendly, loving, playful and kinda stinky, much like Clayton. Bloggy asked Clayton about this and he said “Well, my girlfriend makes me sleep on a pile of old wet hay at night with nothing but a burlap sack stolen from a chicken factory for warmth. I’m allergic to water as well so that means showering isn’t an option. If I get wet, I start traveling through time, uncontrollably. I can use hand sanitizer but once again, time travel.” It was at this point that Ben, who sits beside Clayton, pointed at an empty bottle of rye whiskey on Clayton’s keyboard and made the universal hand gesture for *glug glug* “Ah, you’re drunk as a lemur. I was starting to worry about you Mr Walker. Carry on!” Have a frank and productive weekend…
Kevin has a lot of bad ideas but riding bikes in the snow is not one of them. His text came to Bloggy a minute after 9 PM, which meant sleeping gown and starched sleeping cap had been donned and the blessed act of sleep was being realized. Even though I missed the fun, beloved Hawley coworkers Patrick and Clayton acted as my pleasure-ride surrogates. OK, that sounded extraordinarily creepy but that’s never stopped the relentless creepiness of this blog. Since it’s 2014 and we all know reading is going the way of the dodo, Kevin was kind enough to provide a few photos of the night’s frivolity. Behold the frivolnous…
Kevin whipped up a snazzy video as well that’s on the Hawley Facebook. Check it out below or better yet, watch it via our FB page…
The weather is taking a turn for the worse today at the Hawley mothership. Rain, ice, snow, general pestilence. It’s going to get nasty but no worries on our end. The Northwave Artic is in stock (along with the Extreme Winter, Celsius and Fahrenheit) to keep our feet dry and our spirits high. BRING IT WINTER!!! Ti spacco la faccia!!!
Catlike showed up at our national sales meeting and dazzled the assembled sales reps with a panoply of new helmet offerings for 2014. Sensing a marketing opportunity, Wagster’s mood was punctuated with each new helmet he slipped onto his gigantic, pulsating noggin. Behold two examples.
Pensive, wistful, gassy:
Disconsolate, lugubrious, extraordinarily gassy:
Hawley presidente Steve supplied the finger ears. Have a frank and productive weekend!
One of Hawley’s newest vendors is the resurgent Swobo bikes. The company has had a colorful if not varied history but have assembled an extremely solid collection of bicycles and clothing for 2014. This year’s models are utilitarian but framed within an understated aesthetic that is both modern and clean. Looks aside, the bikes ride great; super-smooth but snappy accelerating and stable handling. Chicago rep Dennis Burg said “These bikes will supplant automobiles as humanity’s primary form of transportation by October”. While this is an insane comment, one can’t help but wonder if the IceBurg’s portent were to come to fruition. On a related note, here is an image of the IceBurg outsprinting Clayton in the parking lot. YOU GOT SERVED STRETCH!!!
Swiss Stop makes a lot of great products but their most effective export might possibly be their international sales rep Christian Heule. For those who don’t know, Christian was a pro cyclocross racer and more importantly, one of the nicest human beings in the cycling industry. Patrick is the Swiss Stop product manager so Bloggy thought it only right he pose with the man who controls the flow of fine quality brake pads to the USA. Also, don’t forget to follow Christian on Twitter,