Category: Race Relations

Hendersonville CX, Tough Shift.

“……. There I was yet again, sliding effortlessly over a patch of dew-slickened grass on the last turn before the start of the backside pavement, and my thoughts immediately turned to food. Specifically, the bagels, scrambled eggs and sausage I had consumed a mere 3 hours before and the insouciant hint of pan grease still lingering in my olfactory cortex like so many distant memories of breakfasts from an earlier time, a better time, a “I can’t believe I laid down my freaking bike in this stupid turn” time. I thought about how wonderful it would be to eat a breakfast of such immeasurable proportions again on Sunday and how sincerely grateful I was that I had been created and raised in the South and how somewhere an obese, ridibund, Southern grandmother with three kindly chins and an outfit 13 years removed from a Land’s End catalog stared vacantly out a kitchen window, shirtsleeves covered in bacon grease and biscuit flower, dreaming of frittes and flyovers. Then I regained my senses, hopped on my trusted steed a mere 4.27 seconds after my initial spill only to realize my right shifter body had cracked in half. Fiddle sticks. We have the technology, we can rebuild it…… SHIF8229. “

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Charlotte, NC: Adventures In Cyclocross

A few of us ventured up to Charlotte for another round of the NC Cyclocross series. As I am currently lightheaded from staring at water bottle catalog sections and their corresponding cages for 5 hours (or is it the ether?) here is a brief video of the Pro 1-2 racers descending and then ascending the first steep bit of the course. Wanted to post the clip where a distinctly audible Rich Dillen is heard saying something about women in skinsuits and other prurient tidbits but alas, that video is lost to the ages…

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Garmin Steps

Not sure if anybody listens to John Coltrane but there’s this quaint little album called “Giant Steps” which has this lovely two minute and 26 second song called “Countdown”. Anyhoo, it starts off with a fairly innocuous drum solo intro thingy and then JC proceeds to lay down about ninety-seven thousand notes of magma-hot improvisation in quick succession. If you could somehow translate that energy into “sales office activity” then you might have an idea of how busy we were with Garmin 800s yesterday (COMP6080). Garmins were flying, literally flying (like guillotines) out of the warehouse destined to dealers who had signed on board our ridiculously generous Garmin 800 sales program. If you’re a dealer who wasn’t in on the program, then you missed out (we’re looking right at you Appomattox Butterrump’s Bicycle and Civil War Sabre Emporium in Pinegulch, GA). But never fear, Derrick has green-lighted the remaining inventory to any and all shops who require the latest in touch screen cycling computer technology. It’s in your face folks. IN YOUR FACE! Speaking of which, more proof that the entire universe is pulling against the Heat and that if Rajon Rondo takes up competitive cycling, we could see the second coming of Coppi. It’s in the stars people…

Not in the stars but perhaps in store for you is yet another local cross race for this weekend. You have been warned and the science has been sufficiently dropped upon your head. That is all. Have a peaceful and non-itchy weekend.

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Stockholm Syndrome

Just received this telegraph from our European liaison/correspondent… “Just landed in Stockholm. The land of Ingmar Bergman and the Swatch, no wonder the suicide rate is so high. As I despise airline food, I must find a meal somewhere before my stomach consumes itself. Outside the terminal, a sea of crummy but well-ridden bicycles festoon a Gordian knot of bicycle racks. Will contact after I reach the bicycle capital of the world in a few days, Copenhagen. The jeweled falcon makes banana pudding for breakfast. Repeat: The jeweled falcon makes babana pudding for breakfast.” Message received, loud and clear madam…

Hawley customers Charleston Bicycle Company are hosting the first round of their mini-cyclocross series this weekend in Lansing, Michigan. No wait, Charleston, SC! Acquaint thyselves…

Adam floated this bit of nastiness from Bike Rumor. That kid looks a little young for tattoos!

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2010 Sumter Metric Century

Racists, take note! The good folks at SORBA-CSRA have brought back the successful Sumter Metric century RACE from last spring in a new, September incarnation. This race was a jolly good time last year and plans to be EVEN BETTER this year. As of this posting, Eric Smith of Cane Creek will be racing in the CX division which means you should race in the CX division. Everybody who finishes ahead of Eric receives a “Hail To The Chimp” DVD and a coupon to Citytrends Fashions in Columbia (this is not a guarantee). I didn’t see an Augusta cross race listed this fall so the Sumter Metric Century may be your only opportunity to thrash around on your cross bike without driving 9 hours to the closest cross race. Details and course map beloooooow. Oh yeah, this race is quasi-pricey but the proceeds go back to the trails so don’t feel so torn when it’s time to loosen the purse strings!

WHAT: Sumter Metric Century
WHEN: Sept 25, 2010
WHERE: Hamilton Branch State Park, near Modoc, SC (camping available!)
COST: $50 for IMBA/SORBA members, $60 for non-members. All proceds go towards trail maintenance in the CSRA.
DESCRIPTION: A mountain bike race through the Long Cane Ranger District of the Sumter National Forest that connects the Modoc, Turkey Creek, Wine Creek, and Horn Creek trails using a combination of paved and gravel roads. There are approximately 28 miles of singletrack. Due to new start/finish location total mileage is just under 70 miles this year. This is a low key, no stress fun event.
FOOD: Hot dogs/hamburgers will be provided after the race.
SWAG: If you register before Sept 6th you’re guaranteed an SMC hat, after Sept 6th you may or may not get one.
LIMIT: Race is limited to 125 racers! If the race does not sell out early then day of registration will be allowed, with a $10 price increase for each class.
CLASSES:
Male Under 30
Male 30-40
Male 40+
Female Under 30
Female 30-40
Female 40+
Singlespeed
Clydesdale
Cyclocross (UCI rules apply for a bike to be eligible)
AWARDS: Custom engraved pint glasses awarded to top 3 racers in each class
SAG STOPS: There are three SAG locations approximately 15-20 miles apart. Racers will actually hit SAG #2 twice, before and after riding the 6 mile Horn Creek trail. SAGs will be stocked with water and sports drink as well as some food. Racers will be given 3 large ziplock bags to send items ahead to the SAG locations.
RAIN POLICY: There is no alternate date. If the trails are too wet to race on without damaging them an alternate route will be used which will bypass the trails using paved and gravel roads.
IMPORTANT TIMES: Check in/registration will open at 7:00am, and the race will start at 9:00am. For safety reasons there will be cut-off times at each SAG to ensure no one is on the course after dark.
OTHER INFO: Race will start with a controlled group ride out of Hamilton Branch State Park. Once all racers are out onto the main loop, the racers will be turned loose to ride their own pace. Racers are REQUIRED to check in at each SAG (just make sure someone writes down your number as you roll through). Failure to do so will get the racer disqualified. This is a safety measure to ensure we know where everyone is on the course.


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Yuri Eliashevsky Sighting, And Some Bike Race Or Whatever…

Lots of rider attrition at this weekend’s ORAMM. It was hot, plenty, mighty hot and that would wear down many an able rider. Fortunately for this rider, a nasty gravel road wreck would end the race before the heat could. Oh well it happens when you never ride a mountain bike, but I felt good in the cool mountain air up until the Ragnarok and the gravel and blood. To use a Vonnegut-ism, so it goes. Also, Jose blames my Continental Race Kings, but carelessness played a greater role. More importantly, I saw the one and only, the man not the myth, the American Dream and Nature Boy rolled into one, Yuri Eliashevsky. Yuri rolled up beside me on Hwy 70, recognized me and said hello. I greeted his hello with “who are you?”. Sorry Yuri, didn’t recognize you with the facial hair and Sycamore kit. Wait, was that a Sycamore kit? Anyhoo, Yuri became impatient with folks on our way up Kitsuma so I yelled at him to be considerate, run those “sheeple” off the trail, pack out what you pack in, live simply so that others might simply live and several other slogans that were sure to motivate him. I then informed a racer behind me, “That’s my Dad.. jealous?” No pictures to provide, nothing more to say. I am in pain and have a slight craving for Chinese food. To top it off, never got a chance to try out my Guided By Voices Curtis Creek climb mix. Dicky always has extensive and entertaining race re-caps, we suggest you acquaint thyself. That is all.

Get Stationary! from Everything Is Terrible! on Vimeo.

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